Hello friends! We all like a good deal, especially a BOGO.  I mean who is going to say no to a free pair of shoes, extra dress…..pastor’s wife.  O wait, has that last one confused you?  Well that’s because you might not be aware, but your church is getting a BOGO.  They hired the pastor and the bonus is his wife.  You may think that seems like a stretch, but let me explain why it’s not.  Your pastor had to go through an interview process that was probably pretty extensive.  And his wife…. well she probably had to go through it to.

My husband has been hired a few times and each time we go through the process, I get brought in to interview as well.  They want to know where you stand theologically, and that you align with them.  They may or may not state their “expectations” for you during that interview, but you better believe there will be expectations.  You will be expected to follow the same guidelines that your husband was given regarding drinking, using tobacco and cursing (in case you’re confused… refer to earlier posts).  Your blessed pastor’s wife is expected to be there each and every Sunday morning, Wednesday night and whatever other events are going on that week.  If she misses even one event, you better believe she will have received a slew of texts, calls and the Spanish Inquisition as to why she wasn’t in attendance at whatever (fill in the blank) event occurred that evening.

But it’s amazing…. because that woman somehow doesn’t get a paycheck.  The church will respond and say that they hired her husband and not her.  Friends, this is what I affectionately refer to as “the BOGO”.  If she’s a youth pastor’s wife, she will be at every youth event.  If she is the wife of a worship pastor, she will be expected to sing on stage.  She doesn’t have “that spiritual gift”?  No problem, she can work the sound board or volunteer in the children’s ministry.  If she’s a senior pastor’s wife…. well that woman will more than likely be at the beck and call of every needy person in your church and be expected to run the women’s ministry to boot!  Never mind the fact that she might work a part or even full time job and have children.   No, she might not work a full 40 hour week like her spouse, but she’s definitely putting in the time.  So although it might not be a buy one, get one free….. It’s definitely a buy one, get one 50% off.

So the next time you see any pastor’s wife running around on a Sunday morning or maybe even trying to hide in the corner, buy her a gift card to any of the following places and don’t ask her to share or tag along:

1.) Starbucks

2.) Lunch to … anywhere

3.) Target

4.) A massage

5.) Wine or a gift card to the local liquor store

Thanks for reading, and go do something nice for that “BOGO” in your life.


The Inappropriate Pastor’s Wife